Saturday, February 21, 2009

Losing my "reset button"

Since I got pregnant, I've been slowly encouraging the idea of weaning to Joaquin. I'm just not one of those amazing souls who are willing to take an adventure in tandem nursing. So my hope is to wean at least a few months before the new baby comes...It's been going surprisingly well.

Our biggest accomplishment has been to cut out nursing to sleep which has lead to totally night weaning. All it took was me asking him to go to sleep like he does at school. For some amazingly strange reason, he just simply falls asleep at school come nap time. I kept asking them what were they doing to make him do it, and they kept telling me that he just laid down and went to sleep! So one night I got up my nerve and asked him to do the same. And he did it. He just laid down, closed his eyes and went to sleep. Who knew all this time I just had to ask the kid?!? Since he doesn't nurse to sleep, he doesn't wake up to nurse. It's amazing.

Since this incredible evening he has slowed down a lot during the day too. For a couple of weeks there, he was only nursing every couple of days. Then he got sick, and has been nursing once or twice a day. This is still a huge accomplishment for us and as soon as he gets over this I'm sure he will slow down again.

One huge thing I've noticed during this transition though is the loss of my trusty "reset button". If he was freaking out, tantruming and/or straight up losing his sh*t, I knew I could always nurse him back to sanity. It just took a few minutes on the boob and he would reset back to his sweet sweet self.

This morning, I don't know what happened, but he fuh-lipped. I tried to distract him. I tried to hug him. I tried to ignore him. I even tried to pawn him off on his father. Food? nope. Drink? nope. A freaking cookie? Nope. I didn't offer milk because I'm trying to stick to the don't offer don't refuse philosophy. So when he finally asked for milk, I agreed. Within minutes he was done and ready for the zoo, like his head wasn't spinning in full on circles just 5 minutes earlier.

So what do I do? Once the milk is totally gone and no longer an option how do I reset him when he goes all satan's spawn on me? My boobs have not failed me for over two years now, I have no other tricks in my bag! So all you wise mamas out there...speak up, I need some tips, tricks and whatever else you'll give me! I'll take it!


Eliska Bobeeska said...

Oh Ciria, you are such a good mommy! I have no idea because I haven't ben there yet...but my guess is that lots of hugs, kisses and holding close are the things that will help him...and help you too when he is flipping out? I'm excited to see what the experienced mommy's have to say, as I definitly have to use my boobs for the same reason all of the time! =) It sounds like you are doing a great job and I'm proud of you.

Shannon said...

When Connor would ask to nurse, I would tell him that they were sleeping because he understood what that meant. He would cry, throw a tantrum, and it took a lot of hugs, kisses, and cuddles for him to calm down, and then he would ask again, get upset again, and then he would eventually get interested in something else. It was hard for about two weeks, then he just stopped asking.

Elaine said...

Anya still gets into nursing position when she's having a hard time. Seems that just cuddling like that reminds her or is a sense memory thing and it usually does the trick. But it wasn't an easy transition...

Alexandra said...

I totally resonate w/this post! Went through the same thing w/Paris - exact same thing. Sadly, I never came up with anything that works as well as nursing to reset her. :( He's used to that reset button, too, so it's gonna take him time to adjust and for you both to come up with something else - by that I mean a continually changing something else that sometimes is a snuggle, sometimes is space followed by a hug, and sometimes this, sometimes that...takes a lot more creativity now. whee. ;-)

Good luck.