Part five of Isela Marí’s arrival: Finally Home

Here is the last bit, again loaded with pictures. Thanks for reading everybody and stay tuned for tons of pictures and plenty of updates of these two...they love the camera after all!

Here are the obligitory links to parts one, two, three & four if you missed them...

Part five of Isela Marí’s arrival: Finally Home

We got home early Sunday afternoon, and Joaquin was still napping at my mom's house so our house was eerily quiet for a few hours as we waited for Joaquin to arrive.







As soon as Joaquin and my mom got there and he realized the baby was home he HAD to get in some serious cuddles.







We bought Joaquin a couple of gifts “from the baby” that we had him open; a Cars DVD, you know for those moments when the TV will be a really good babysitter? And a remote control firetruck. He loved them and thanked the baby for such kind generosity. Even today if you ask him where he got either one he’ll tell you “the baby” gave them to him, it’s adorable. Oh, and check out his awesome shirt.





Joaquin also got Isela two little stuffed froggies. We had been reading a couple of books about new babies, and in the book the big brother buys the baby a stuffed frog. Since then he was on the lookout for a frog to buy baby and he found the two perfect ones at Ikea. He was so excited to give them to her!







I bit later Isela had to nurse and when I went to nurse her Joaquin had a fit. He kept saying that HE wanted milk, not the baby. From there it turned into a total meltdown complete with kicking and screaming. I just started sobbing, apologizing to him for what I had done. That made my mom cry and poor Dan was stuck there with us all crying. Joaquin soon calmed down, but I will never forget that initial feeling of “Oh my god, what did I just do to my family, to my son?” It seriously broke my heart.

It’s been interesting trying to keep him to stay gentle with her. He gets a little Lenny on her here and there, he will try to squeeze her head or pull a finger and he wants to hold her ALL the time. It’s not so much that he’s jealous of her, but that he wants her to be his. He wants to change the diaper, feed her, carry her. Of course, he can’t do all of these things so tantrums usually ensue.

He’s also been very active, all over the place spazzy active. The next day after we got home, we had to go to the park. There was just no way he could have stayed home and we all would have stayed sane. No way.





Oh and here is Isela's park attire...gotta love it.




So we’ve been out and about pretty much every day since we got out of the hospital. While getting out of the house is crazy, it doesn’t compare to the mental institution I would be sent to if we didn’t get out. Seriously.

I had been going on adrenaline for a few days; sleep was OK, but not great. My mom asked if she could take Joaquin on Wednesday afternoon, which turned into possibly that night and the next day. I asked Joaquin and he was stoked to go, I on the other hand was a mess.

I knew I needed the rest and the opportunity to bond with the baby, but I was already missing Joaquin and what we had before baby so much. When my mom came to pick him up I started with the crying, he hugged and kissed me and my mom told me he would be fine. I knew he would, it was me that wasn’t!



I did end up getting some much-needed rest and we were all much happier, but it’s still been hard to see our relationship change so much. Dan has pretty much taken over as Joaquin’s primary caregiver when I’m with the baby. He puts him to sleep, wakes up with him and deals with a lot of the little stuff through out the day. He’s really been amazing.

While I love and appreciate this, again, I just miss my time with Joaquin. There was a night a few nights ago where I just cried most of the evening. Joaquin was acting up, it seemed like every thing with him was a battle and I just wanted the old “us” back. I know we’ll never get that again and we all have to adjust to a new normal, but still. It’s hard.

I can’t believe I ever thought life with a newborn was hard, or even life with just a toddler! When it’s just one on one, everything is sooo much easier! With two? Not so much.

I know things will get better and we’ll all adjust and actually we’ve made quite a bit of progress over the past two weeks.

What was normal before the baby is no longer and as a new family we're slowly but surely making our way to what will be our new normal.

You should watch this.

Reducing Infant Mortality from Debby Takikawa on Vimeo.

Part four of Isela Marí’s arrival: Afterwards

Finally a part four and with lots of pictures! After I finish up five about our arrival home and slowwwly adjusting to life with two, I think I might take a break from these and eventually get to the compare and contrast down the road at some point. I just really want to get back to our regular life posts!

Here are the links to parts one, two and three if you missed them!

Part four of Isela Marí’s arrival: Afterwards

Baby girl was born at 8:38 pm. We had arrived at the hospital just before 7:30 or so, parked the car out front and got me checked into the Birth Center. Dan made a trip to bring the stuff in and parked the car in the parking garage. The ticket for the parking garage said he parked at 7:56 pm. Yep, and then 42 minutes later we had our baby. Crazy, huh?

Baby Girl (she was still nameless at this point) latched right on, I was amazed at how quickly she was ready to nurse and kept telling everyone to “look, look she’s latched on!” The nurses wrapped her up while she was on me and I soon delivered the placenta. After the chord had stopped pulsating, Dan did the honors of cutting it.

Unfortunately, because everything happened so fast, we didn’t get any pictures of the birth or immediately afterwards, which was kind of a bummer. The tub was only a quarter full by the time I birthed, so they just emptied it and they had to call the doula back to go home! Small price to pay though, right? I’ll keep telling myself that.

I then called my mom and step dad, Robert, to break the news. I had called them when we were leaving for the Hospital Birth Center, but told them to stay put and to not come until I called them again with a better estimate as to timing and what was going on. I assumed we would have time to get settled and then I would call and maybe have an idea if they should come down with Joaquin or not. I was not opposed to him seeing the birth or to him being nearby during it, if it happened to work out that way. I was more concerned about his sleep schedule and didn’t want to have him up at the hospital all night. So you can imagine their shock when I called not to tell them when to come down, but that I had just had the baby! I remember telling Robert “I couldn’t help it, it just happened!”

Dan and I had a little bit of time to ourselves with the baby and then the nurse weighed and did all the newborn stuff except of course the stuff we opted out of. Yep, that's me about an hour and a half after the birth!








My parents and Joaquin soon showed up. Joaquin had been obsessed with babies since we talked about them so much to prepare him as best we could for what was ahead, so he was super excited to meet little Baby Girl. Dan was holding her when they met for the first time and it was love at first sight. Joaquin seemed a little scared of me though and was hesitant to get too close to me at first. It wasn’t until I was holding the baby that he came and finally gave me a hug. I still wonder why.








It was a great thing I had had a big bowl of pasta before we left for the 3pm visit to the midwife to sustain me through the birth but I’m so glad that I had packed our birthing cooler full of goodies because I was suddenly starving! While my mom and Robert both got some cuddles in I ate my ginormous sandwich and some crackers…I’m telling ya, that was the best tasting sandwich I have ever had! Over the next two days I worked through the remainder of the cooler goodies, so all that work in early labor totally did not go to waste!





At this point we still didn’t have a name. It was between Isela (ee-SEL-ah) and Dahlia. For a while I was leaning towards Dahlia, but over the past couple of weeks I just knew in my gut was going to end up being Isela. I knew my mom wanted Isela; she did give it to me as my middle name after all, and Dan had been leaning toward it all along. Finally that first night, Dan and I decided. Baby Girl was now Isela Marí,

When the family all left it was well after 10pm, we did our best to get some sleep that night, but we were both running on a pretty big adrenaline rush. The nurses were great about trying not to disturb us while still helping me with all the fun stuff like going to the bathroom. We were in a big queen sized four poster bed and they were totally cool about us all sleeping together as a family. It did kind of suck though that there was no TV or even wi-fi so Dan watched some boring netflix movie on his computer while I slept on and off.

The next day and night were a bit of a blur. My mom and Joaquin came for another visit as did my sister, Ceci and her husband, Brandon. Later in the morning Dan went home to freshen up and came back a bit later in the afternoon to keep me company and to bring me some "Friends" dvds. Iris also came by and took some pics of Isela and I. Eventually I sent Dan back home to get a decent night’s sleep though, while I stayed the next night with just Isela.










That night my regular midwife was on call so she came and visited me and told me how proud she was. It was great to see her at the end of it all even though she didn’t end up getting to assist me with the birth.

Because we had to stay for at least 24 hours for the newborn screening, we weren’t released until Sunday around noon. At first I was kind of bummed that I had to stay as long as I did, I was really missing Joaquin, I mean just thinking about him was bringing me to tears, I just wanted to hug and cuddle him soo bad! But looking back it was a good thing. Life is crazy at home with two, and being forced to be waited on hand and foot wasn’t such a bad thing…now it was time for reality.







Part five of Isela Marí’s arrival: Finally Home

Part three of Isela Marí’s arrival: The Birth

Here is the 3rd, but not quite final installment of Isela's birth story! Here is the link to Part One and Two if you haven't read them yet. Also, if you're afraid of hearing about the gory details of childbirth or don't want to imagine them happening to me...you may not want to read on! Yes, that warning is for all the guys who are curiously checking this out...

Part three of Isela Marí’s arrival: The Birth

My contractions were super close together on the ride home so I decided to lie down while listening to my hypnosis. I didn’t want to start timing them knowing they were close together only because of the sweep, I knew that they would most likely spread out a bit again and they did. For the next three hours or so I tried a variety of different positions all while listening to my Hypnobabies to keep me centered, calm and focused.

Each time I got settled in a position the contractions would spread out a bit to 4-5 minutes apart and each time I moved positions they were just about 2-3 minutes apart. I lied down on my side, paced back and forth and returned to my side while in the tub. My favorite position though, was sitting on the birth ball with my head resting on a stack of pillows on the couch. With each contraction I would rock myself this way and that while I hummed though the peak. I soon realized that I was humming louder and louder and my peaks were getting longer and longer.

I remember during one of my pacing sessions, looking at myself in the closet mirror during a contraction. My eyes looked eerily light. I stared at myself and just focused on the pressure, on the purpose and on envisioning my body relaxing and opening up. I remember thinking to myself that it “hurt so good”, you know, like a really intense massage or workout. I imagined the “pain” I was feeling to that of an athlete or a runner. You feel the pain, but you know it’s there for a good reason so you want it, you almost enjoy it, you welcome it. It never got to a point where I couldn’t handle it, but it was there and I wanted it because I knew it was doing its job.

I then realized that I couldn’t talk to Dan while in the middle of a contraction, that I was feeling some waves of nausea during them, I was also trembling a bit as well. At first I thought that I was just wimping out, that I was succumbing to the contractions. I thought that because it had only been three hours since I was checked and only 3cm, how could I be feeling overwhelmed already? Then I remembered that those were all signs of the beginnings transition, where everything starts to get really intense. By 7pm, I figured it was time to call the birth center and for us to head over.

By the time we arrived I was really having to concentrate through each contraction. Yes, there was pain but it was more the intensity of the pressure that I had to work through. The Hypnobabies was really helping to deal, but again, it was a lot of work to concentrate through them. I had to moan through each one, it was a way to release the pressure. As soon as we got to the birth center they got us set up in a room and the midwife, Jasmine, said she would be right back to check me. They gave me hospital gown to change into that I just put over my tank top; I knew I wouldn’t want to be in it for long. Dan had gone to park the car and I found a chair, pulled it up to the bed, and sat there with my head on the bed, alone in the dark. Things were really picking up and my moans had turned into loud groans.

Jasmine soon came in and had me lay on the bed, when she announced I was a 6 contracting to a 7 or 8. I was ecstatic. I knew that was close to the end for me and knew I could get through a few more hours of it. They asked if I wanted the birthing tub filled, a doula, aromatherapy and a birthing ball. I said yes to it all, I wanted all the perks of the birth center! I changed out of the gown and into a sarong and my tank top. We put a Hypnobabies cd on the player and I was comfortable and ready to keep going!

I continued to sit on the birth ball with my head on the bed. Dan sat behind me and I had him push on my lower back, no massaging, just constant counter pressure. It was perfect. I was totally in my own world and dealing. Then I felt pressure down below, lots of it, like I had to push. But I knew that I was probably not dilated all the way so I held back. Jasmine was just watching me and could tell I was holding back and not comfortable and told me that if I felt like I had to push and bear down, to go ahead. To listen to my body. So I did. It relieved so much of the pressure and made it sooo much easier. But then it suddenly got too much and I ended up standing with each contraction. That’s when I saw Jasmine tell the two nurses to get stuff ready. I watched them bring in a tray of tools and stuff and I thought to myself, “She’s crazy, it’s not happening yet, we just got here!”

But with each contraction I continued to stand up and my groans turned into yells. Then I suddenly had the urge to poop! I stood up in a panic yelling, “I have to poop, I have to poop!” I know I probably did, but everybody was nice enough to keep it to themselves. Yes, it happens. Jasmine kept calmingly telling me, “No, it’s the baby, it’s the bag of waters, it hasn’t broken yet, just listen to your body.” My body kept pushing on it’s own and I kept freaking out that I was going to poop everywhere! Jasmine asked me what position I wanted to get in on the bed and I kind of yelled, “I don’t know what I want!” I was starting to lose control and was panicking; I didn’t think she would really be coming already!

I was on all fours on the bed and Dan was near my head, I grabbed on to his arm with one hand and pulled while pushing on his body with my other. My yells had turned into growling screams. I can’t say it was because of the pain, but again, as a means to release the pressure. Jasmine kept telling me that as soon as my water broke her head and body would follow and then suddenly I felt a huge pop and a gush. I fell to my left side and continued to push. I didn’t have it in me to lift my right leg so Dan had to do it for me. He was so awesome; he just jumped right in and became a part of the whole thing and totally got me through this crazy part!

I remember thinking “So this is the Ring of Fire that everybody talks about” because I hadn’t felt it with Joaquin. But as soon as I thought that, the burn went away, then it was just all release. All release from pushing her out. I reached down and felt the top of her head and knew we were almost there. I screamed with each push and continued to push and pull on Dan. Jasmine, Dan and the two nurses all cheered me on and I just kept hearing Jasmine telling me to listen to my body.

At one point it got kind of quiet and as it turns out I had only pushed out her head and then I stopped. They were all waiting for me to push again. I think my body was just taking a little break because I heard Jasmine tell me again that it was OK to keep going and then I started back up again. The weirdest feeling ever is feeling my baby squirm out of me. It didn’t hurt, it just felt really really weird. They picked her up and put her on my chest. I fell to my back and looked down at this tiny little baby on my body. I was somewhere, somewhere very far from reality as I stared at her. I was in awe of what my body had just done…again.

I remember holding her and smiling and giggling, totally in a euphoric daze. Then I looked up at Dan and said, “Holy shit, did you see what I just did?!” He kind of laughed, with the same dopey smile I had and said, “Yeah, I did.”



I still have so much more on my mind that I feel I have to get out. So, I will continue with these knowing that this was the “good part” for most. Don’t worry, my feelings won’t be hurt if you’re done here…it’s just that I’m not.

What more could I possibly write about? Well, there is the post birth stay at the hospital Birth Center, which includes the first time Joaquin meets his baby sister, our first days at home and how that is going as a new family. I also keep comparing and contrasting my two births, it took everything to not make this birth story a big compare and contrast and just the story of Isela’s birth, so I may add that as well.

So, if you’re interested, there is more…and if not, I really hope you enjoyed the story of Isela Marí’s birth.

Click here for Part four of Isela Marí’s arrival: Afterwards

Part two of Isela Marí's arrival: It's Really Happening!

Here is the 2nd installment of Isela's birth story! Sorry for the cliff hangers, but I'm writing as I'm posting...the end isn't even written yet, I swear! Here is the link to Part One if you haven't read it.

Part two of Isela Marí's arrival: It's Really Happening!

Joaquin finally woke up around 7:30 and my contractions were just under 10 minutes apart and slowly getting more intense. When I went to stand up, my lower back was a mess. I could barely stand up straight with the constant dull ache. I wanted to hang out with Joaquin a bit in the living room knowing that this was it and he would be going to go my mom’s soon. Unfortunately, on the couch when he was trying to be cuddly it translated into him crawling all over me and making the contractions much less tolerable.

I called my mom and told her what was going on, but knew I couldn’t wait for her to come and get him. So Joaquin and I quickly got dressed and I drove him to my mom’s. Yes, I drove. Remember, the contractions were still pretty far apart and totally not intense yet…but getting there and she only lives about 20 minutes away. When I left I told Dan that it was probably the day, but I don’t think he believed me since right after I said that I drove off! Once at my mom’s I ate breakfast and tried to relax a bit. Again, it was really too difficult with Joaquin and all the distractions so I made a quick getaway back to our house where I could focus in peace and start listening to my Hypnobabies. Before I left I gave Joaquin the biggest most smothering hug he would let me give him and told him that the next time he saw me, I would have Baby Girl with me. His eyes lit up and he looked at both me and my mom like “really?” then he was off to play.

If you don’t know what it is, Hypnobabies is a birthing program that consists of a bunch of scripts read aloud by some lady on CD. It’s considered Hypnosis for childbirth but one is not under hypnosis like on a magic show or something, it’s more like super duper relaxation and focus on letting your body do what is simply meant to do. There is a cheese factor when first listening to the scripts, but if you can get past that, the end result is so totally worth it.

Anyway, at home Dan was dressed to go to work, I had to quickly put him in check and tell him he wasn’t going anywhere, this was it. I still don’t think he believed me. I called my chiropractor and made a one o’clock appointment for a final adjustment. I know it’s helpful in early labor plus my back was killing me. I was so afraid of back labor and know how much harder it makes for a natural birth so I wanted to do anything I could to help it go away! I also had a midwife appointment at 3pm, I had no I idea where I would be in terms of progress at that point so I wanted things ready, just in case.

By 11am I got in the shower and labored while hanging over my birth ball with the shower water hitting my lower back. I also let the tub fill up a bit and sat on the ball with the shower running over me. It made my back feel so much better, but as soon as I finished the ache returned.

I still had time and wanted to be prepared so I worked on the remainder of my labor projects. I wrapped the presents for Joaquin “from Baby Girl” and started packing the birthing cooler. I prepared a bag full of snacks and treats, made four big sandwiches for Dan and I and cut up and packaged some strawberries and watermelon. I also added a bunch of electrolyte drinks for me and some iced tea for Dan. We were set on food just in case of a long drawn out birth. If not, we were set for afterwards!

After I finished off the final additions to my hospital bag I finally I got dressed and we headed out for my chiropractor. She was awesome and did her regular adjustments and wished me good luck. No big hoopla, it was like she adjusts women in labor everyday, well she probably actually does. I didn’t feel instant relief, but by the time we got home I realized that I was no longer thinking about my back…It worked!

Back at home I packed up the cooler, checked some email and then it was time to head to the midwife to get there by three. My contractions had picked up and were just over 5 minutes apart. While I knew that that probably wasn’t enough progress to get admitted, I wanted to have our stuff with us just in case things picked up. I was really looking forward to laboring in the tub!

I feel like the trip to see my midwife is where everything turned from early into active labor. Just the walk from the car to the offices was enough to throw my contractions closer together, but when she checked me I was still only 3 cm and 75% effaced. In one last desperate attempt, I had her sweep my membranes to hopefully jump start things. She knew I was in early labor so she called the birth center to see how full it was and luckily they had a room ready and waiting, just for me! She suggested we continue to labor at home or walk around the area a bit since I was still only three stinking centimeters dilated. I opted to go back home and labor as much as possible there. I was disappointed, but was confident that we would be back by that evening.

Click here for Part three of Isela Marí’s arrival: The Birth

Part one of Isela Marí’s arrival: Pre Labor

Isela Marí was born on August 7th at 8:38 pm. She was 8pounds 4 oz (just like her brother) and 19 inches long.





As I started writing this birth story, it slowly got longer and longer as I got all my thoughts and emotions down. I’m not one to sit and read multiple pages on a blog (or anywhere) so if you don’t mind, I’m going to break this down into multiple parts…I hope you enjoy!

Part one of Isela Marí’s arrival: Pre Labor

I was in pre-labor for weeks, I know this is what my body does, but it doesn’t make it any easier to manage, especially with a very active little one to chase after on a daily basis and the heat. Oh the heat the past couple of weeks!

When I say pre-labor, I mean mild to annoying contractions and cramps about 10-15 apart for weeks. That with the oh-so-fun and painful “natural cleansing” out of my “system” day after day made for some interesting emotional moments.

At my 38 week appointment, my midwife told me she thought I was going to go into labor within five days. While I really really tried not to let that arbitrary timeline enter my frame of thinking, it was always in the back of my mind. I pretty much made sure everything was ready to go and by that five day mark when Baby Girl still had not made her entrance I was completely let down. I knew better than to listen to those silly “she’ll come early” predictions, but I still let it get to me.

Then came the full moon. If you asked me weeks ago if I wanted to give birth on or around the full moon, I would have said HELL NO! I know it has some kind of pull on pregnant women and I knew that that would mean competition for a room at the birth center. I wanted a room and a good one, one complete with a birthing pool and a volunteer doula. I did NOT want to compete with a bunch of other full moon birthing moms for stuff I was counting on my entire pregnancy.

But the full moon was coming and I was tired and done. They say it has it’s strongest pull two days before and after the actual full moon, so by the night it was at it’s fullest and nothing was happening, I was straight up pissed. We even went for a walk to the local market for ice just after dark just so I could walk under its “powers”. Silly, I know.

The next day was my actual due date and I was in much better spirits, probably because it had started to cool down significantly. I went for breakfast with my mom & Joaquin and we walked around Ikea. It was exciting to actually say “today!” when someone asked when I was due. That evening Dan, Joaquin and I went for a nice long and cool walk at the zoo. By the time we got home my contractions had finally kicked it up a notch but were still well over 10 minutes apart. I had a feeling that things were headed into the direction of actual early labor so I knew I had to get as much sleep as possible.

I slept OK considering. I did wake up every hour or two, each time more confident that things were actually progressing. I hugged and cuddled Joaquin as much as he would let me; I knew things were going to be very different after that night and I wanted my cuddling fill of him! By 5:30 or 6 AM, I couldn’t sleep anymore. I got up to pee a couple of times, but mostly I just snuggled with Joaquin and Dan anticipating what the day was possibly going to bring.

Click here for Part two of Isela Marí's arrival: It's Really Happening!

A bit of an update.

How lame is it that I only have 3 posts under January? That must change so here I am to update you all, and bring my monthly posts to a whopping FOUR!!

So the past few months have been really really hard. I've had the morning sickness, the exhaustion and even the depression. My pregnancy with Joaquin was pretty easy, so I wasn't prepared for this. All of that on top of chasing a toddler and working full time was just too much. But this past week the clouds have parted and I can see the light! No more nausea, gagging and puking. I can make it past 8pm and I'm not a walking emotionless zombie. I am getting headaches though. It seems like as soon as the nausea stopped the headaches came on full force. I went most of last week without one, but woke up to a lovely one today. Hopefully it's a passing phase.

Life is interesting these days. Dan is working the tax season doing taxes so that is good. Unfortunately he's not making much dinero, but he does enjoy it. We're both hoping this leads to something beyond the tax season.

There were two things I swore to myself once we were pregnant and having another child. One was that I would stay home with both kids for a minimum of a year...minimum. The other was that I would have a homebirth. I'm not sure if I'm getting either. Well, I'm pretty much positive the homebirth is not going to happen and we're working on the me staying home thing, but I'm not sure how much time we're going to be able to pull off.

The realization of these two things have really taken it's toll on me emotionally. I'm trying to stay positive and worry about things I can control, but money, or lack of it just plain sucks.

So that's where I've been lately...sitting around gagging and crying over money. Pretty obvious why I haven't been in the mood to write much, right?

We'll see what the coming months bring...

Two years ago today...

Charles Joaquin was born at 9:15 am on November 28, 2006 at Sharp Mary
Birch Hospital in San Diego, CA. He weighed in at 8 pounds and 4 ounces and 20 and half inches long. It was really an amazing birthing experience considering it was at a hospital, and I'm so thankful to have had it go the way it did.

Two weeks prior to his birth date, I started feeling signs of pre-labor. I was having Braxton-Hicks more and more often along with menstrual type of cramping. I had lost what I thought was my mucous plug and I was sure that labor would come any day. Each time I went in for my weekly appointment I had dilated a little bit more and my Doctor stripped my membranes. I was walking as much as I could to get labor going and each morning that I woke up still not in labor was a disappointment.

Finally on Sunday night, November 26th, his actual due date I started getting contractions that felt quite different and were much more regular. There was a bit of pain with each contraction that I openly welcomed because it was a sign that these were possibly "real" as opposed to all of my pre-labor. I tried to go to sleep and they kept coming at about seven minutes apart. I knew that was still quite a bit apart, but I also knew that this was something real. I couldn't sleep anymore and I was kind of in a dazed state. I pulled out my ipod with my Hypnobabies (self- hypnosis) and tried lying down on the couch. Finally at 1am I called my doula and told her what I was feeling. She told me that they were still far apart and to try and rest as much as possible. I just couldn't lie down anymore so I started on my birth day projects. I made some cookies and got some snacks ready for Dan for the hospital. While I was working in the kitchen I noticed they were coming much closer together, but were not that much more intense.

Finally at about 4 am I decided to take a bath. I brought in my Hypnobabies and lied down in the warm water. That was when they pretty much completely stopped! While my body was enjoying the break, I was so utterly frustrated, I had no idea what was going on and I wanted to be in real labor already!! I got out eventually and fell asleep on the couch, with still no regular contractions.

The next day,Dan went to work and I went about my day totally disappointed with the fact that I wasn't in fact in labor. I had a Doctors appointment later that day so Dan came home early and drove me since I was still getting contractions, just not very regularly. They also still felt like they did the night before, some pain, but nothing I couldn't handle without concentrating through. The doctor told me I was about 3 cm and 50% effaced. She told me she was on call on at the hospital Wednesday and if I wanted to I could come and they could try inducing. I had no intention of taking her up on her offer, but thanked her. By the time we got home I was exhausted so we decided to take a nap and see what happens. I woke up at about 5 pm and the contractions were back and regular and getting more and more intense. I was so excited!!! But at the same time I didn't want to set myself up for more disappointment.

I used my birth ball and hypnobabies for the next few hours while Dan timed my contractions. They went from about 7 minutes apart to about 5 by 11 pm that night. He started to doze so we pulled out the sleeping bags and camped out on the couch. I had notified my doula that I think it was coming soon and kept going on the birth ball and with my ipod. I took a bath and did my best to relax and focus on my hypnosis. I don’t remember how long I was in there, but it was hard because I could barely fit and it was difficult to stay warm. At about one or two I thought I was ready as the contractions were about 3-4 minutes apart. I called my doula and she encouraged me to rest at home a little longer. I was so glad I did. While listening to my hypnobabies I managed to nap on the couch for about an hour. I remember kind of dreaming my way through the contractions it was almost surreal. When I woke up, they were much closer and stronger. I stood up to go the bathroom and I felt a sort of pop, I assumed it was my water breaking, but there wasn’t a huge gush like I had heard it described. The contractions were then definitely getting stronger and were about 2 minutes apart. I called my doula and we were on our way to the hospital and arrived at about 4:45 am.

When I arrived at triage, I kept myself in hypnosis, but I was still able to hold conversations and was obviously fully conscious. They didn’t seem to believe I was in labor and took their time with me. Finally when the nurse checked me she seemed surprised to report that I was 6 cm and in active labor. She made a call to the Dr on duty and I heard her trying to explain that I was using hypnosis that that I was in fact in active labor and that I really was calm and collected. Finally they sent me on my way to the delivery room.

Once there, things got way more intense. I had to moan my way through the end of each contraction. I can’t say it was pain free, but it was manageable. I paced and rocked around for a couple of hours. They kept trying to put the stupid belt around me to time my contractions and keep track of the heart rate. It kept sliding off and the nurse would have to come in and fix it, very distracting. I was going to try and use a squat bar, but I just didn’t want it. I wanted to be on my side. I finally made my way to the bed where I landed on my side and didn’t get up from then on. I felt him coming down the birth canal and I felt like I was ready to go, but they kept telling my I wasn’t dilated enough. I remember a primal groan coming out of me with each contraction. I pleaded to let me push as my body started bearing down without my permission. Finally I remember my doula asking rather firmly if they could check me again. Sure enough I was ready. I felt me body take a little break and they within minutes the contractions were back again.

The nurses told me to wait, that the room wasn’t ready yet. Yeah right. I was ready and this baby was coming out now, if the room is ready or not! The on call Dr came in and asked me to get on my back. I refused. I knew I just couldn’t. I was afraid it would slow me down and I was ready and comfortable in the position I was in. I heard him say he was worried I would kick him in the head. My doula promised him she would hold my leg if he let me stay on my back. He sounded peeved, but obliged. I should have still kicked him. They set up a mirror and I saw my baby Joaquin join the world at 9:15 am. Pushing wasn’t so bad; I don’t remember much pain after I got into bed. It was more just very intense pressure.

Joaquin was placed in my arms and started nursing right away. After I delivered the placenta the rest of my family arrived. I recovered quickly so we only stayed at the hospital over night. By the next morning I was tired of being stuck in a bed and was ready to get out and about. Like I said, the birth was actually pretty great considering I was at a hospital. Of course there are things that I wish would have gone differently, but I had a wonderful, drug & intervention free birth and an awesome kid to show for it!


Happy Birthday Joaquin!!!

Birthing Options part deux

Thank you to all who commented on "Birthing Options".

I've done a little digging and it looks like it would be pretty easy to get coverage at Best Start. That kind of annoys me because about halfway through my pregnancy with Joaquin I stopped by there when I was feeling particularly uneasy about the hospital birth. Whomever I spoke to looked at my insurance card and said my insurance wouldn't pay for it, I would have to pay out of pocket. Now I find out all I would have had to do was change my medical group to one that has a Dr that they work with. Oh well, whatever. I can't go back and change it and I still had a great birth with Joaquin. Even in the hospital.

I also did a bit of research on the Home Birth front. I emailed a midwife that is very well known amongst my mama friends. She gave me an idea of what I would deal with, and it sounds like something that could happen. At this point, I'm really leaning towards the home birth. But any further research and investigation will probably have to come when I do get pregnant.

It's just nice to know I actually do have options.

Birthing Options

Let me start this out by saying I am NOT pregnant. But I will admit that I've been thinking about it a lot.

My birth with Joaquin went fairly well, especially considering it was a hospital birth. I used the Hypnobabies technique and had a doula, both which allowed for me to have an unmedicated complication free vaginal birth. However, I can't help but feel like it could have gone a lot better. I still felt like I had to be on guard to make sure they didn't stick me with something or decide I had a complication. I felt the pressure to perform because if I didn't, I knew drugs and possibly a c-section was on the way!!! So, the next time around I don't want a hospital birth. But I really have no idea how to make that happen with my insurance plan. I have all this coverage, but it seems that all the coverage is only through a hospital. I would love to give birth in a birthing center or maybe even possibly at home with a midwife.

I feel like before we can even think about getting pregnant, I should get this squared away so I can have the same level of care throughout the pregnancy. But how? Who do I call? It's like, what came first, the chicken or the egg? Who do I call first? My insurance company or a possible health care provider? I wish there was someone I could just call with my question and they would do all the digging, like an insurance advocate or something. Or is that supposed to be an HR person? With a district this big, I have no idea who or what that person is. Any advice out there?